16 Days Old
Posted by auntiem10 on September 29, 2011
The past few days have been really, really hard. Our Baby A, who was born with clubbed feet, received the first in a series of casts at the local children’s hospital yesterday. She is totally miserable… won’t sleep unless we are holding her despite the fact that she’s obviously exhausted, cries whenever we handle her no matter how gentle we try to be, and just acts like the casts are the most uncomfortable things in the world. I spent this morning crying and contacting both her pediatrician and orthopedist to see whether anything can be done to make her more comfortable. The verdict was to see how she does today, and then bring her to the children’s hospital in the morning if things are still bad. They will remove her casts, examine her to make sure nothing is rubbing her skin and that she’s having no reactions, and then recast her. This is going to make her hysterical, so we have to decide if it will be worth it. Last night we split time in our recliner holding her so she would sleep a little. I hope for her sake that tonight is better… it can’t be healthy for a 16-day old newborn to be unable to sleep more than five minutes at a time.
I am learning all about mom guilt… I feel so incredibly awful that she is uncomfortable and that there’s nothing I can do about it. We’re not allowed to give her Tylenol to try to help her because it may end up masking another problem, and the casts are unfortunately a necessary evil. I would give anything to take the discomfort away… no newborn should have to deal with this! I realize that some newborns out there deal with so many worse medical problems, but you can’t blame me for wanting to take away my child’s pain, no matter how minor the situation may be. Everyone keeps trying to comfort me by reminding me that she won’t remember any of this… I do not feel comforted because it doesn’t change the fact that she has to deal with the discomfort right now. Although I wouldn’t want time to speed up because I’m enjoying every minute of getting to know our babies, I am counting down the hours until this casting business is over.
Things are going well otherwise… our babies are starting to gain back some of the weight they lost after birth, and they are keeping us on our toes. We are so busy, I haven’t had much time to comment on all my friends’ blogs or stay caught up. I am sorry! I’m lucky to shower every other day and fit in a meal or two per day right now, and that’s even with the help of my husband being at home with me full-time until November. I’m hoping to catch up soon and am reading along as much as I can. Thinking of you all!